


Fall from Grace

by ScotCoyjedii



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Angst, and sacrafice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-06
Updated: 2014-06-06
Packaged: 2018-02-03 14:39:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1748213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScotCoyjedii/pseuds/ScotCoyjedii
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Story of the Russian Roza and how she fell. unbeta-ed</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fall from Grace

**Author's Note:**

> Star Trek doesn't belong to me.  
> Roza does.  
> Beware curses and profanity and possible star trek wwiii flashbacks. Not to mention the history on a crazy roman emperor just a little bit

              Roza never was anything but absentminded and maybe a bit prickly she did this so people would leave her alone, she was an nothing more than an ambassador to Russia she never wanted to go for presidency though she fantasized about becoming a Russian President. She never really was any older than twenty when she first was stuffed into that tube tormented by that brat Green for two years before he too was shot for mass murder and genocide his father shared the same fate. It never made her feel any better to know they were gone the trauma was too great but she never stopped crying her three husbands all died of radiation poisoning or something else she couldn't stop her children remained in Russia to the end of their days they never knew their mother because she was in cyrostasis by the time they were three. She regretted not having had raised them she regretted not saving her biological sister from a strange death that not even the best hospital in the world in Japan could save her from, child birth. It should have been normal but she had a seizure in the 35th hour and died from it a hour later, she got to see her boy and name him before she died at least. The boy was only ten when he too was put in cyrostasis and now she couldn't even find him because of that bastard Admiral Marcus warmongering we refused and we paid the price with twenty of our own people that we couldn't save.

       The fires were too hot they were trapped behind a white hot fire they were unable to be retrieved I blamed myself I never forgave myself for my ultimate failure and no one knew how much it hurt. I lied to save face in front of the crew that woke me up because I didn't want them to know my shame, of my self-hatred but on a lower extent but one that denied me so much without even knowing that I myself was the enemy of my own self preservation. I had nothing to lose, I had already lost everything I had lost every one that I knew so well from my time and place we were scattered and forgotten as the rest of us were.

       "Roza! Don't let go!" The Captain said his tone was desperate and decisive Captainly sounding _but this request I couldn't fulfill at all I have failed in life my honor will not be restored I saw several people falling I knew who they were SPOCK! UHURA! no. I thought looking over my shoulder downward they would reach death in seconds I had to act._  The artificial gravity was failing, sabotage simply put and I couldn't let these people die tears streaking my face looking at the Captain's face dirty and coated with sweat & tears those big blue eyes watering when he realized what I was going to do.

          "I hav nyet a choice,"I whispered. "For the great Kahless, Today is a good day to die."I roared  my eyes full of a brightness and as I let go I phased into the half-human half-cougar werebeast slowing my decent saving the people I needed to Spock, who held onto Uhura with all his abilities.Had I not speed climbed up with them I wouldn't have been able to save Anya Chekov or Pavel Chekov as I dropped them off where Kirk was dizziness was a side effect of that speed for normal people. I vasn't normal vas I?

I did the same thing again and again, till I myself was exhausted but one final person fell and I needed them alive to make history more than I ever could McCoy, Keenser, and Scotty. With ease I brought them to where Kirk and the  others were but I knew it was over for me I have pushed myself too far and I don't regret any of it.

_**Twelve days ago:** _

I vas on a routine mission(less mission more like forced landleave by captain Kirk) on planetside would ya' have guess I  vould get a concussion due to a moron deciding on laying wolleyball on my head hard it was a pleasure planet and personally the most annoying of them all . Unfortunately I lacked athletics like my father vho vas barely on the track team my mother was athletic my biological parents were at least, vas the fact I refused to be athletic vhich I couldn't do anything but hit a damn ball, play badmitton which none of these people knew how to play( I had hoped and prayed one day their would be some convergence as it being a national sport or at least in the Olympics my hopes in vain), and run like crazy not to mention practice my fighting skill _that_ I did in private. I'm trying to enjoy my swim in the too warm waters in what should be a temperate zone , I roll my eyes because I knew they had cheated the environment _environmental controls could cause havoc on a normal planet that wasn't formerly subject to violent earthquakes and floods as unpredictable as the Roman Emperor Caligula's final months as Emperor. Next thing I know a volley ball spins towards me at high speed and I end up nearly drowning when I do get hit its hard, did I mention they knocked me out cold with the same volley ball? I swear Q is playing a sick joke on me half the time just because I'm one sixteenth Q  means nothing to me apparently it does to the universe or Q or something. I end in sickbay with blood on my brain or something having to do with a really bad concussion major I think and a apology from the person that I couldn't decipher at the time being rushed to sickbay I couldn't understand a thing they were saying. As silence finally fell over me wrapped in darkness I never realized how much trouble I vas truly in until it was too late._

 _My telepathy is nulled and doesn't return it annoys me but drives me up a wall I speak to no one about this secretly going nuts within the safe sanctions of my own mind never acting out or speaking about such things deciding its best if no one really knows. I had hoped it would reassert itself like it did before after I turned nineteen three months of nulled telepathy after puberty led the onslaught of its ability evolution it reasserted itself then but now I don't think it would. How could I miss voices that I could single in on and understand that they weren't my own inner voice. I missed the telepathy I held so dear it told me what to do without knowing physically what to do I couldn't hack without it because I had no clue how to hack computers no longer responded to me. Now they just seemed to be halfway muted they seemed to not understand what was wrong in a way almost crying out, they only responded sadly like they knew my pain same with my cat Victor who comforted me with that sad face he looked so terribly sad to know he couldn't hear me no more. As I couldn't hear him anymore either it was silent except for me and the silent past lives who seemed to mock me ever so silent taking a step back and saying nothing like they knew why this happened and weren't going to tell me why._

 _

Only one person knew the truth I knew her well enough to know she wouldn't give up on my family on my crew either and she was my de facto leader of our cyrostasis tubed comrades I didn't even know she was awake and alive until she came to talk to me telepathically that was the last time I  would hear from her at all.

_**Now:** _

I let go I knew that I was finished my energy gone they tried to help my scramble back onto the shaft they were in but my hand slipped too quickly they narrowly missed Kirk, Scotty, Chekov, and Spock looked over they were sad as they were the last faces I saw a smile on my face I died when I reached the bottom of the shaft. McCoy was surprised to find out I was pregnant and saved the kid by putting it in a synthetic womb or something technologically advanced like that was beyond me now in the morgue. Some were hardly surprised when they went through my quarters and found a will drawn up ages ago. It could surprised you that I died pleased? My memory shall never die as long as you remember my joy that left me too soon joy taken from me that I now bestow upon you fear not what is yet to come look _forward_ to it this I learned from the Klingons who relished the battle and to die honorably. Despite our differences in time and genes due to time's we were born in species to me doesn't matter I've seen things I've done things I regret but now I let this go as today I have restored my honor in the name of the Great Kahless the Unforgettable I only hope that my friends from the ship lost are found today my journey ends in this body but I will return I always have just never forget me and I'll never forget you. Do svidaniya! Remember me for I will never forget you and I will always be watching over these people, the crew _of the Starship USS Enterprise_ of the United Federation of Planets. _**Live long and**_ **_Prosper._**                      

          

_


End file.
